Tons Of Cow -- apologies to Brent Mydland -- by Richard E. Baum

(Sung to the tune of Tons Of Steel, by the Grateful Dead)

I know this field we're on like I know my Geurnsey's smile
We've seen a dozen dreams in every manure pile
Can't begin to count the quart's of milk she's given me
But I wish I had a dollar for each glass I drank for free

Nine hundred thousand tons of cow... made to mow
Their teeth at work and with all that grass
Their udders are sure to blow
Nine hundred thousand tons of cow... out of control
They're more a rolling milk truck than that herd I used to know...

It's one hell of an understatement to say they can't be mean
They're temperamental, just a big grass eating macine
They weren't built to travel at the speed a mower rides
But these cows'll chew that grass and scare away the flies!

Nine hundred thousand tons of cow... made to mow
Their teeth at work and with all that grass
Their udders are sure to blow
Nine hundred thousand tons of cow... out of control
They're more a rolling milk truck than that herd I used to know...

The grass out did itself growing around the back
I can only hope the cows are ready for a snack
Well I have prayed to God this ain't the death of me
The cows are now around the pool, eating up the weeds!

Nine hundred thousand tons of cow... made to mow
Their teeth at work and with all that grass
Their udders are sure to blow
Nine hundred thousand tons of cow... out of control
They're more a rolling milk truck than that herd I used to know...

Ooh, ooh I want to milk them slooow
Oooh oooh oooh oooh oooh oooh ooh
Nine hundred thousand tons of cow... out of control
They're more a rolling milk truck than that herd I used to know...

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